Pretty Wings & Other Thoughts
I've been thinking, as I usual do. :) But I'm finally getting somewhere with my thoughts instead of running into a brick wall. I talked to a boy that I really don't know that well, but that boy conjured up all these feelings & thoughts within me. I've always dated guys that have nothing going for them, thinking I didn't deserve someone who did. I'm finally learning to give myself major love. I abused myself for so long, thinking I wasn't worthy. I'm worthy. I deserve the best. I don't deserve pain.
L & I HAVE to part ways. I always think this, then I go back on my word. But, it's honestly for the best. I love that boy, I do. But, we have different path's, & they aren't crossing. I have a lot I want to do, & I'm not exactly sure what he's doing with his life. It's not fair to me to put up with this shit anymore. I have to make a change, & view my past from that rearview, once & for all.
Different subject:
I asked my dad the other night what he wanted to be when he grew up as a child, & he said so many things. Ex: Architect, photographer, artist, industrial designer, etc. DId he ever do any of these things...? No. He's an English teacher at the community college. I'm not knocking his career that supports our family, but I want to do what I have always dreamed of doing. Not settling for less. I know every thing happens for a reason, & my dad worked his ass off to get his PhD. I'm super proud of him, but I want to end up doing what I spent my child hood days dreaming about.
I can't have any roadblocks in the way, or distractions. I need positivity, love, support, & I need to have my space. I always feel like I need a guy's attention, but I'm realizing that I have my attention, my love. My families love. I don't need a guys attention to be happy, to be successful.
There are only good things in my future, & I'm striving to make them happen.
So, girls AND guys, don't let love blind you into walking away from your passions, & dreams. Love, but love knowing that you won't ever let your dreams get away from you.
Fly your pretty wings around.
Lily's blog Technicolor Tiger Lily
I've been thinking, as I usual do. :) But I'm finally getting somewhere with my thoughts instead of running into a brick wall. I talked to a boy that I really don't know that well, but that boy conjured up all these feelings & thoughts within me. I've always dated guys that have nothing going for them, thinking I didn't deserve someone who did. I'm finally learning to give myself major love. I abused myself for so long, thinking I wasn't worthy. I'm worthy. I deserve the best. I don't deserve pain.
L & I HAVE to part ways. I always think this, then I go back on my word. But, it's honestly for the best. I love that boy, I do. But, we have different path's, & they aren't crossing. I have a lot I want to do, & I'm not exactly sure what he's doing with his life. It's not fair to me to put up with this shit anymore. I have to make a change, & view my past from that rearview, once & for all.
Different subject:
I asked my dad the other night what he wanted to be when he grew up as a child, & he said so many things. Ex: Architect, photographer, artist, industrial designer, etc. DId he ever do any of these things...? No. He's an English teacher at the community college. I'm not knocking his career that supports our family, but I want to do what I have always dreamed of doing. Not settling for less. I know every thing happens for a reason, & my dad worked his ass off to get his PhD. I'm super proud of him, but I want to end up doing what I spent my child hood days dreaming about.
I can't have any roadblocks in the way, or distractions. I need positivity, love, support, & I need to have my space. I always feel like I need a guy's attention, but I'm realizing that I have my attention, my love. My families love. I don't need a guys attention to be happy, to be successful.
There are only good things in my future, & I'm striving to make them happen.
So, girls AND guys, don't let love blind you into walking away from your passions, & dreams. Love, but love knowing that you won't ever let your dreams get away from you.
Fly your pretty wings around.
Lily's blog Technicolor Tiger Lily
you are too sweet. :) this just made my day.
ReplyDeletePeople have told me before I'm mature for my age, which I guess I believe because I'm friends with people my age...& I just wonder about them sometimes.
haha, one day they'll grow up. I'm sure of it.
Well, I'll keep posting if you keep reading:)